Relapse…

I relapsed this weekend.  I felt really horrible about doing it, but couldn’t seem to stop myself.  I guess I didn’t want to have a “bad” weekend because alcohol wasn’t involved.  How sad is that?  I’ve decided that I need to change my mindset completely.

I was starting to feel really good on Friday after 5 days sober.  I wasn’t as tired during the day, and I was more focused.  Then I cocked it all up.

I am on Day 2, again.  I joined the forum at Sober Recovery last night that is full of good information, and tons of members who are going through the same thing I am.  I also looked up the AA meetings where I live, and there are plenty that I can get to with my work schedule.  My husband has said that he would like to go with me.

I realize that I can’t do this alone, and I am in a place that I really want to see this through.  I want to live a sober life.  I have a feeling that my depression will get so much better when I am not actively putting a depressant into my system.

I need to keep the mindset that every day without a beer is a small victory.

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Comically Inept
    May 18, 2010 @ 13:30:16

    Thanks for reminding me that “every day without a beer is a small victory.” I’m not amazed that I have five years as of today; I’m amazed that I haven’t had a drink since waking up this morning. Surrounding yourself with people who have what you want, by going to meetings, sounds like a good idea. I’m pulling for you.

    Reply

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